hey all, long story short i’m going to be taking a break from this site and blog for the next week or so to get my head sorted, i’ve been trying to internalise a lot of shit for a couple of months and now that it’s all reaching maximum brain capacity i need to regroup and reprioritise. i need to figure things out away from external influences or tempting distractions/procrastination before i let myself get bogged down and overwhelmed again, bc i can feel that happening and i really don’t want to throw all of the progress i’ve made over the past couple of years out the window in favour of thinking i can muscle through it again when it didn’t work last time. i can’t, and now i wont.
so i’ll still check in but i wont be posting until approx next weekend, maybe, but if you want to chat i’m always up for it and you can reach me at my inbox whenever you need to as per. i’m still here if you need me, i just need to take a step back for now and have a think, but i promise i’m not just going to disappear.
much love guys. see you when i’m hopefully feeling a bit healthier and more positive about things. stay safe, all the best <3
My Intent Is to Be the Source of My Own Inner Light
“My pictures must first be beautiful, but that beauty is not enough. I strive to convey an underlying edge of anxiety, of isolation, of fear. ” — CrewdsonFAOsomesuburbs
"The suburban landscape is alien and strange and exotic. I photograph it out of longing and desire. My photographs are about repression and internal angst." [— from the same source]
Also yeah, I’ve said it before, but like when people are like “why doesn’t Harry ask for help more, why doesn’t he ask questions” THAT IS LITERALLY WHAT HE LEARNED HE WOULD BE PUNISHED FOR DOING GROWING UP. It was drilled into him not to ask for help.
Like the scene that will always break my heart is when Ron discovered Umbridge was basically forcing Harry to mutilate himself, and he was like “WHY THE HELL DIDN’T YOU TELL ANYBODY? WE NEED TO TELL SOMEONE RIGHT AWAY” and Harry’s reaction was “they’re busy, they don’t need me causing them trouble, it would just get them in trouble, they don’t want me to bother them” instantly and Ron was like “what the fuck man” because that is just so, so accurate to what you learn when you’re being abused and bullied. Do not ask for help. Do not bother people. They don’t want to deal with you, this kind of thing is normal and things will just get worse if you do.
It was just really well and subtly done. How Ron completely didn’t understand and was horrified but this was obvious and normal to Harry. Of course he was used to doing things on his own. Of course it was his instinct to keep it a secret.
Limitless undying love which shines around me like a million suns, it calls me on and on across the universe…
But you know a protest to this would be to just repeatedly clean the toilet. Just do it. Pretend you’re in a video game and grind toilet cleaning for points.
water and rewater and rewater the plants. Kill the plants. Drown the plants.
Expose the system. Exploit the system.
If So | Atlas Genius
everybody’s taking what they can but they can’t decide
they do what they want cause any kind of feeling’s alright
Photographer/ Creative Director: by Nyree Mackenzie Nyree Photo
Model: Gisèle Pletzer
Stylist / Fashion Director: Tamzen Holland Fashion-Stylist
There are two little boys outside my apartment building playing Captain America and Winter Soldier, and — I’m not even IN MCU fandom, but this seems very accurate — they are just taking turns carrying each other to an imaginary safe-zone, bridal style.